Run up to a couple holding hands and quickly grab one of their free hands. Have a friend take a picture. Send a picture to the couple’s parents with an anonymous note informing the couple’s parents of their children’s bisexuality.
Buy a bag of candy Valentines hearts. Separate the whole hearts from the deformed ones (check bottom of bag). Give the whole hearts to couples that you know. Poison the deformed hearts and put them in the peanut tray in a singles bar. Now they don’t have to pick up the tab!
Write a sitcom based on a dancing robot who can’t find love because he doesn’t have a heart. At the end of every show, love forlorn, he thrusts his metal claw into someone’s chest and pulls out that person’s heart. He then does The Hustle. Sell the sitcom to FOX (you may have to call it, “That Dancing Robot Show!”) and use the money to buy lots of hookers.
Men: At a large sporting event, hire a skywriter to write, “Will you marry me Susan? ” Watch the fun as everyone dating a woman named Susan tries to hide from the Jumbotron. Women, do the same, except hire a skywriter to write, “Ron, I’m pregnant!”
© 1997-2003 Maryland Cow Nipple. All Rights Reserved
No comments:
Post a Comment
Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.